Someone told me you were back in Freddy but we haven't heard anything of you over at the Embassy. There was even apparently a sighting on the weekend but again it can't be verified. If Mike's house was for sale then we might see you eh? Maybe we'll put a sign out just for some bait.
Normy is very upset; he thinks it's probably because Noah is scared of him but I thought it was more likely because you guys may think that we are a bad influence on the kids. Look, when I gave Noah that beer last year it obviously wasn't his first. And now that Mike is home again we have put most of the sharp objects away too! Our place is kid friendly...
Regardless of whether we have seen you or not, it's very nice to have you guys home. I'm a fan of the repatriation project. Give us a call when you are ready for some birthday beers...
For those of you that don't have access to American commercials this little gem has been making me laugh for weeks and I really felt the need to share it with you:
Now the past couple of times I've seen it I've nearly fallen over laughing because I added a little wrinkle. Both of my roommates, Jess and Normy, have been in Halifax working for Dany in his continued efforts to take over the world. They have been sharing a hotel room and I like to think that this is the scene that Dany walks in to everytime he comes in to get them to do some work....
I woke up this morning and it felt like I played a rugby game on the weekend!
Turns out I had of course. We travelled to Boston (or thereabouts) for our first game of the season on Saturday. Most of the boys travelled down on Friday but thanks to the the family men (aka Teddy and Terry Humpadink) we decided to maximize hometime and travel down Saturday morning. So we hit the road at 5:30 or so and made it to Mass. at about noon. We met up with the other fellas at the hotel and headed for the field. We played on that new artificial turf which is actually soft thanks to shredded recycled tires. It makes for a very fast track which was a bit hard on us because it tested our fitness for the first game of the year. We lost the game (48 - 22) to a fairly good US team but we're happy with how we played for our first game out while missing a few regulars. We look forward to playing them again sometime to get some retribution.
A few of us spent the night and managed to find some high culture in Amesbury. There is a ballet there called the Tens which has high quality shows. I was with what was possibly the most motley crew you could ever assemble (excluding Motley Crue of course). A Scotsman, the Black Hitler, an Irish Troll, The Bastard, and whatever the hell Izzy is. Quite a handful I must say. There is a joke in there somewhere...
We made it back to Canader around 4 o'clock on Sunday and I have to say as much as I like America and it's people (and I do despite their leadership and direction) I always feel a palpable sense of relief when we arrive at the border. I think it's quite simply because I know if I screw up in Canada, I mean really screw up, I know some Mounties. In the States I know some Bardsley's and that's probably not going to help anything.
There are various myths surrounding the associaton between 420 and smoking weed. I think I probably saw it on a t-shirt somewhere first but never really took notice. By the time I went to see Phish in '97 I think I would have asked the question "What the hell does 420 refer to?" just so I didn't feel even more out of place then I already did. Well whoever answered the question for me likely had it wrong because I distincly remember hearing that it was the the California Police code for "smoking in progress". This is wrong as are the other twists I've heard. To get the full story check it here.
So one of those summers living on Graham Ave I was up on the Miramichi fishing with Malcolm and Scotty at Little Forks. On the way out of woods I noticed one of the backroad highways was number 420. I put that little nugget in the back of my head...
A couple of weeks later we were out on a Tuesay night (likely drinking fishbowls, singing karaoke, and swimming at Queen Sq) and we got the bright idea to drive to the 'Chi to get that sign. Superfriend was (totally uninterested but) sober and we had Slippy's Big Rig so we could ride in style. But we didn't have the keys. North had gone to bed (read: passed out) and we for some reason thought he had the keys. We spent an hour trying to stir him or get into his locked room to find the keys. This gave Normy a chance to make a break for it; he was out of there in a flash. No one noticed he was gone until we finally broke into North's room to get the keys (we were great tenants!). Of course once we got into his room the keys were no where to be found. Slippy then checked his pocket and there they were! So no we had the keys but no driver. We were committed though so we called Normy's family home and made him come back to go. If he just had have said no it would have been ok but the stealth departure really stirred people in to action. Amazingly he came back and we started on the road. He was adamant that he didn't want to have to drive two hours while the rest of us slept in the luxury that was the Big Rig. We swore that we would all stay up and even guaranteed him $50 from anyone who fell asleep. We went to the Irving and stocked up on coffee. It didn't work...2 hrs and 10 minutes later we had the sign and everyone owed Normy $50. It's time to pay up!
He said he will use this money to replace the sign as it's come our attention that all kinds of locals are getting lost trying to get from Renous to Sunny Corner. Usually around 4:20 or so...
I wrote the final exam for my deviance class night. I spent most of the day Sunday and Monday at the library "studying" for the exam. I think I discovered a new type of deviance; if the societal norm is to study at the library then my behaviour may have been slightly deviant. Actually that's not altogether true; I did some good studying and thanks to some helpful classmates I may just have done well. I actually knew the theories pretty well (insert your own damn joke here) and possibly too well. Usually when I go into an exam I have to bullshit my way through parts of it and write a nice wordy passage that masks my lack of knowledge on the subject (although my marks may not hold that truth). This time I knew the subject matter so well that for a couple of questions I needed to just spew out all of the facts to show my knowledge of the material in the time allotted(1.5hrs). Context is key though so we shall see how he marks it. I really think I should have included a cheque to the FHS Black Kats Football Team. This picture does pretty much sum up my worst nightmare though; I was also a little disappointed that one of the questions wasn't "Discuss a typical Saturday night". I always liked telling stories to the Wiz.
It was also surreal to be back in the UNB Main gym writing an exam. I am still amazed at how young people can look and still be in university. I was very happy to see some folks older then me in there. I like to look at them and call them "mature" students; that way I can confidently exclude myself from them. Hiyo!!!
I remember being slightly confused when I was growing up at the reasons behind Easter Celebrations. I knew it was religious but couldn't understand why there was no such thing as Easter Carols? I do remember singing "The Easter Bunny is Coming to Town" to myself but I also remember that it was likely to mask my overpowering fear of the huge bunnies at the mall. Some kind of transference from that jolly chap who brought me presents I guess. Either way, I vividly remember eating my chocolate bunnies with some level of hate in an effort to bite back at my fears as it were.
Despite my fears I have always liked Easter and not only because of the chocolate. I also like the ham and the time off of school/work (I somehow now associate chocolate, ham and laziness with the coming of spring). It still confuses me though and nothing more than that Cadbury's bunny that makes those clucking noises...spooky.
Anyways, I don't mean to be too glib as I know that for many people it is a very important time in their faith and I absolutely respect that. For me it is a time to reflect on my own faith and spend some time with the family. I got to do both and I'm very glad for that, confused or not.
Dave "Acorn" Jackson is 23 dyslexic years old today. In dog years that is alot, but he's never been a dog.
Davey is truly one of the most genuine people you could ever have the pleasure of meeting. And I think this story pretty much sums up his honesty: One fall in the mid-90's the boys took a trip to Bishop's for the Big Annual something. It was Halloween. They all brought costumes with them, some better then others. This year may have been the introduction of Gooch's classic Elvis c.78 jumpsuit but it was definitely the year Davey introduced us to Sherlock Holmes. He was decked out with a tweed trench coat, a makeshift magnifying glass, and two ball caps placed on his head in opposing directions to immitate Dr. Holmes' signature cap. Late in the evening Davey was having a conversation with a couple of young Bishop's co-eds when the conversation turned to costumes. For the sake of the story I'm going to assume they were both dressed up as sexy cowgirls. Dave, in his typicall manner, low-keyed his own effort. "I know my costume's not the best but....". The problem was that at this point he was in the bar, had checked his coat and misplaced his magnifying glass. So all he was wearing was two ball caps. When delivered in his down home diction it's hilarious I swear. Anywho, Happy Birthday Dale Jerkson!
Speaking of Jackson, word on the street is that he his heading for Europe at some point this summer. Rumours abound that he found his jacket and magnifying glass and is rekindling his role of Sherlock Holmes and is going off in search of the truth about French Fries. I thought they were invented in Florenceville but he swears it's Belgium. No shit.
Today is also My darling sister Sarah's birthday. For years Sarah annoyed the hell out of me by being stronger then me. She physically convinced me that General Hospital was more important than Voltron. As if! And If I went to Mom or Dad to tattle on big sis I could be guaranteed the world's worst (or best, depending on your point of view) Indian Sunburn. Looking back though I'm awfully glad she was there to protect me from all that scary corn.
Right about the time that I grew up and got bigger then her she decided to enter the real world and become wildly successful. Now she annoys the hell out of me by being a successful businesswomen (check it here). And now as I consider entering the real world she still protects me from things but now it's more likely to be from a scary dinner bill.
She's the best...
Guppy
So I know alot of people with birthday's this week...it makes me wonder what the hell was going on that so many folks were getting it on at this time of year; any ideas?
Shortly after graduating from Keg U with his steakology degree, Sean "Larroquette" Hamilton headed west in search of the mythological H-Bone steak. At least that's what Normy told me when I asked him.
I think he may have left because this story got spread around: One beautiful summer's day in Fredericton Hammy joined some folks for a boat ride on the Saint John River. As Captain "Crunch" Doherty pulled the George into the marina at Oromocto he asked Hambone to jump off to tie the boat off. Hammy took that completely literally and did so right then despite the fact that they were no where near the marina yet. He started swimming for the marina while everyone on the boat fell over laughing.
I hope this finds you well Bone; Happy (belated) Birthday!
And like the sun comes up, somewhere Hammy is enjoying a cigarette; here's to living good all of the time!
I'm writing a paper for my Deviance class about violence in sport. During my research for the paper I came across this quote in an article:
"Serious sport has nothing to do with fair play. It is bound up with hatred, jealousy, boastfulness, disregard of all rules and sadistic pleasure in witnessing violence. In other words, it is war minus the shooting." - George Orwell
Bingo! And that's why professional sports have drafts...
In other news; I went to a wine and food extravaganza at the Delta on Saturday night. I met up with at least two people who, early in the conversation, asked me why I didn't have a girlfriend. I told both of them that it was because I was gay but only got to say "April Fools!!" to one of them before they walked away.
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Happy Birthday Gregsta!!
